Miss Memory Lane: A Memoir
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- Create Date：2022-06-01 18:21:36
- Update Date：2025-09-06
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- Author：Colton Haynes
- ISBN：1982176172
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Summary
A brutally honest and moving memoir of lust， abuse， addiction， stardom， and redemption from Arrow and Teen Wolf actor Colton Haynes。
Four years ago， Colton Haynes woke up in a hospital。 He’d had two seizures， lost the sight in one eye， almost ruptured a kidney， and been put on an involuntary psychiatry hold。 Not yet thirty， he knew he had to take stock of his life and make some serious changes if he wanted to see his next birthday。
As he worked towards sobriety， Haynes allowed himself to become vulnerable for the first time in years and with that， discovered profound self-awareness。 He had millions of social media followers who constantly told him they loved him。 But what would they think if they knew his true story？ If they knew where he came from and the things he had done？
Now， Colton bravely pulls back the curtain on his life and career， revealing the incredible highs and devastating lows。 From his unorthodox childhood in a small Kansas town， to coming to terms with his sexuality， he keeps nothing back。
By sixteen， he had been signed by the world’s top modeling agency and his face appeared on billboards。 But he was still a broke， lonely， confused teenager， surrounded by people telling him he could be a star as long as he never let anyone see his true self。 As his career in television took off， the stress of wearing so many masks and trying to please so many different people turned his use of drugs and alcohol into full-blown addiction。
A lyrical and intimate confession， apology， and cautionary tale， Miss Memory Lane is an unforgettable story of dreams deferred and dreams fulfilled; of a family torn apart and rebuilt; and of a man stepping into the light as no one but himself。
Four years ago， Colton Haynes woke up in a hospital。 He’d had two seizures， lost the sight in one eye， almost ruptured a kidney， and been put on an involuntary psychiatry hold。 Not yet thirty， he knew he had to take stock of his life and make some serious changes if he wanted to see his next birthday。
As he worked towards sobriety， Haynes allowed himself to become vulnerable for the first time in years and with that， discovered profound self-awareness。 He had millions of social media followers who constantly told him they loved him。 But what would they think if they knew his true story？ If they knew where he came from and the things he had done？
Now， Colton bravely pulls back the curtain on his life and career， revealing the incredible highs and devastating lows。 From his unorthodox childhood in a small Kansas town， to coming to terms with his sexuality， he keeps nothing back。
By sixteen， he had been signed by the world’s top modeling agency and his face appeared on billboards。 But he was still a broke， lonely， confused teenager， surrounded by people telling him he could be a star as long as he never let anyone see his true self。 As his career in television took off， the stress of wearing so many masks and trying to please so many different people turned his use of drugs and alcohol into full-blown addiction。
A lyrical and intimate confession， apology， and cautionary tale， Miss Memory Lane is an unforgettable story of dreams deferred and dreams fulfilled; of a family torn apart and rebuilt; and of a man stepping into the light as no one but himself。
Reviews
Jennifer Lauren
，
It’s hard not to have a visceral reaction when reading Colton’s memoir - for more reasons than one。 Sometimes celebrity memoirs gloss over events or experiences。 They get “prettied up。” Not here。 Colton doesn’t shy away from sharing a very specific and ugly （and not often talked about） side of Hollywood - and I wouldn’t be surprised if because of his boldness and bravery， this opens the doors for more actors/actresses to feel comfortable enough sharing their stories too。On a personal note， havin It’s hard not to have a visceral reaction when reading Colton’s memoir - for more reasons than one。 Sometimes celebrity memoirs gloss over events or experiences。 They get “prettied up。” Not here。 Colton doesn’t shy away from sharing a very specific and ugly （and not often talked about） side of Hollywood - and I wouldn’t be surprised if because of his boldness and bravery， this opens the doors for more actors/actresses to feel comfortable enough sharing their stories too。On a personal note， having met Colton at a convention， I can say he is every bit as kind， humble and gracious as he appears to be in interviews/social media。 。。。more
David
，
Thank you to Colton Haynes and Atria Books for the ARC giveaway copy on Goodreads。First， this was an incredible memoir。 BUY IT NOW （it comes out tomorrow， May 31， 2022）。 Now， I have to come clean: I was not too familiar with Colton Haynes' work going into this memoir。 What drew me to this was the description that it was a memoir about coming to terms with his sexuality， abuse， addiction， and what I was sure to be insights into mental health。 I greatly enjoy memoirs about coming to terms with one Thank you to Colton Haynes and Atria Books for the ARC giveaway copy on Goodreads。First， this was an incredible memoir。 BUY IT NOW （it comes out tomorrow， May 31， 2022）。 Now， I have to come clean: I was not too familiar with Colton Haynes' work going into this memoir。 What drew me to this was the description that it was a memoir about coming to terms with his sexuality， abuse， addiction， and what I was sure to be insights into mental health。 I greatly enjoy memoirs about coming to terms with one's sexuality。 Anything dealing with mental illness - depression， anxiety， and addiction - also interest me。 This was one of the best memoirs I have read on the subject， and in general。 Colton - because I feel after reading this we are clearly on a first name basis - takes a meandering approach to his life story， which is a great way to write a memoir。 The key to this memoir is this: while it is told linearly in time， it is a bit more conversational than most memoirs I've read。 Hence the "meandering" tone of it。 Indeed， I'd have to go the step further and call this more than conversational。 This was therapeutic conversation。 I felt more like I was sitting down with Colton at a group therapy session or an intimate moment of vulnerability than reading a surface-level puff-piece。 He is here to tell his story， to review his life for himself， and to help others by telling his story honestly and openly。 One draw back to his style - which is such a minor， personal thing - is that sometimes names and people pop up with little context， as if I am supposed to know who this person is already when it is the first time they have appeared in the narrative。 （Some of this is probably due to my ignorance over his television career。） Stick with it and you get the context or at least the purpose they play in his memoir。 Then again， isn't that life？ People pop in and out and they aren't the focus of the story; the events involving these people are the focus。 For a moment I felt this distracting， but then I realized it wasn't necessarily about who this person is so much as what they represent or what event occurred with them present。 I once read another celebrity coming-to-terms memoir from an out gay celebrity and I felt let down by the one-dimensional approach of stating things but never exploring them。 Colton NEVER says anything without truly exploring his emotions and thoughts。 He is viscerally honest about his parents， his family， his friends， but most importantly himself。 For example， he speaks of childhood trauma and abuse and tells you what he felt and how it shaped him。 In another instant， he speaks of his thoughts around men and being gay， what he sought out and why， how that made him feel。 This was beyond honest。 This was truth。 I felt the truth coming off the page。His approach is moving。 I cannot tell you how many times I cried。 I cried because what Colton went through was at times disgusting， at times saddening， and at times heart-wrenching。 I cried because what Colton said rang so true to my own experiences。 I cried because of how Colton laid bare his life， even his unhealthy thoughts on sex and how he has grown from his experiences。 I cannot still believe how what he said could easily have come out of my own mouth。 Reading this made me cry because I realized my own history and life， I realized how I look at men and sex and how similar it is to how Colton viewed them。 I was left emotional， in the best ways possible。 Though I was left in tears， I am left feeling immense gratitude to Colton for his honest memoir。 It showed me I am not alone。 Not in my anxiety and depression。 Not in my sexuality。 The highest compliment I can think of for any memoir that is confessional and honest is that it made me feel like I'm not alone。 Colton Haynes' "Miss Memory Lane" made me feel seen and heard。 I see Colton。 I hear Colton。 I am glad he has shared his story and I am so glad he wrote this book。 In short: This is perhaps THE BEST memoir I have ever read。 Certainly it is the best memoir I've read about coming to terms with one's sexuality and dealing with one's own faults， becoming self aware and actualizing changes for a better life。 I wish Colton all the luck in the world with this book and in whatever he does in the future。 He， like everyone else in this world， deserves to be loved completely and unconditionally。 Based on this memoir， he has begun to love himself in that way。 。。。more
Michele
，
This is the first memoir I've read and reviewed。 I've never been a fan of them since I typically prefer the escape that fiction provides。 That said， I was drawn to this initially because I've watched Colton Haynes in Teen Wolf and Arrow。 Once I read a synopsis of the battles he's fought in his life， there was no way I couldn't read this book。First of all， I need to say if you have triggers， approach this one with caution。 Colton's childhood was anything but traditional。 He experienced abuse at a This is the first memoir I've read and reviewed。 I've never been a fan of them since I typically prefer the escape that fiction provides。 That said， I was drawn to this initially because I've watched Colton Haynes in Teen Wolf and Arrow。 Once I read a synopsis of the battles he's fought in his life， there was no way I couldn't read this book。First of all， I need to say if you have triggers， approach this one with caution。 Colton's childhood was anything but traditional。 He experienced abuse at an extremely young age and it set the tone for his life of self doubt and low self esteem。 As an outsider， you look at him and acknowledge that he's stunningly attractive。 Colton realized his appearance could get him things early on and used it in ways that were damaging to him even though he didn't understand that at the time。 He became an easy target for exploitation。 The story is heartbreaking in many ways。 It chronicles Colton's unhealthy relationship with his body and sexuality。 Even though he realizes at a young age that he's gay， he's told to "go back in the closet" when he starts trying to get acting jobs。 As time progresses， he's told to keep it quiet and that he shouldn't come out。 Denying who he truly is damages Colton emotionally。 He begins to rely heavily on drugs and alcohol to make it through the day。 Along with the challenges Hollywood brings， Colton is still dealing with ghosts from his past。 Primarily， his relationship with his mother is one that he clearly regrets。 I was impressed that he didn't hold back。 Colton opens himself up and puts his pain and hurt in the pages of this book。 He only brushes on his acting roles with the two tv series very briefly。 So， if you want to read it for background information on either Teen Wolf or Arrow， you won't get that in this book。 What you get is a frank and raw detail of Colton's pain。 As tragic as his story is， it's also uplifting because he's identified his demons and he's now dealing with them。 This book is definitely one way in which he can process his emotions and be open about how things impacted him。 It's brave and I commend him for sharing of himself to this level。 It's very eye-opening that being attractive can often be as much of a burden as a blessing - - sometimes more。This is a five star read for me because I believe if anyone is willing to bare their soul to this level， they deserve it。 In addition， it's a consuming read。 You just can't believe the things he's lived through。 Regardless of how difficult some of it can be to read， it was well worth it。Thank you to NetGalley for this ARC。 I voluntarily chose to read and review it and the opinions contained within are my own。 。。。more
Stephanie
，
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️Miss Memory Lane by Colton Hayes a special thanks to Atria and NetGalley for the ARC of this book。 To say I was shocked reading this is an understatement。 It’s so raw and emotional。 Having watched Colton in a number of shows， Arrow， Teen Wolf and Scream Queens。 I was curious about his memoir and what he had to say。 He lays it all out for you。 He explains how hard life was with addiction， eating issues and the loss of his mother。 You could feel so much thru his worlds and self reflectio ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️Miss Memory Lane by Colton Hayes a special thanks to Atria and NetGalley for the ARC of this book。 To say I was shocked reading this is an understatement。 It’s so raw and emotional。 Having watched Colton in a number of shows， Arrow， Teen Wolf and Scream Queens。 I was curious about his memoir and what he had to say。 He lays it all out for you。 He explains how hard life was with addiction， eating issues and the loss of his mother。 You could feel so much thru his worlds and self reflection。 This one will stick with me。 I would definitely add this to your TBR！ 。。。more
Simeon Tsanev
，
Colton Haynes is someone I’ve been aware of for literal decades， and in recent years I have been following his very public and very vulnerable mental health journey。 I was excited for this memoir， but frankly I did not expect it to hit me as hard as it did。Miss Memory Lane is a haunting story of a child born different among adults battling their own demons， who were in turn negligent and taking advantage of him， instead of building him up。 A journey of an adult who inherits those same demons as Colton Haynes is someone I’ve been aware of for literal decades， and in recent years I have been following his very public and very vulnerable mental health journey。 I was excited for this memoir， but frankly I did not expect it to hit me as hard as it did。Miss Memory Lane is a haunting story of a child born different among adults battling their own demons， who were in turn negligent and taking advantage of him， instead of building him up。 A journey of an adult who inherits those same demons as he tackles a world of cynicism and indifference， only to get to a point where the choice becomes one between his own sanity and death。At times brutal and at other times painfully innocent， this memoir is both shocking， and exactly what I expected。 An un-funhouse mirror in which one can see oneself just as easily as Colton himself。 Some of us have been the ones objectifying him and others like him， with no concern for the humanity behind the chiseled abs and square jaw。 Others have experienced the same soulless regard， a cumulative abusive coldness that some individuals can be blamed for， yet we all partake in at times。 Miss Memory Lane is an ultimately hopeful experience， but one that leaves a scar， and for that， I truly appreciated it。 It is not an easy read， but it is a read I would highly recommend， because you will come out of it with more understanding and empathy than when you began。 。。。more
Wendy VanDellon
，
I received a free copy from Atria Books in exchange for an honest review。Colton Haynes’ Miss Memory Lane stands out among other celebrity memoirs as a tapestry of unflinchingly honest depictions of the model and actor’s early life。First， full disclosure， I’m a massive Teen Wolf fan， who is unbelievably excited for the revival movie。 The show defined a chapter in my life， so I knew of Haynes prior to picking up Miss Memory Lane。 Arrow was also a show that occasionally made it into watching rotati I received a free copy from Atria Books in exchange for an honest review。Colton Haynes’ Miss Memory Lane stands out among other celebrity memoirs as a tapestry of unflinchingly honest depictions of the model and actor’s early life。First， full disclosure， I’m a massive Teen Wolf fan， who is unbelievably excited for the revival movie。 The show defined a chapter in my life， so I knew of Haynes prior to picking up Miss Memory Lane。 Arrow was also a show that occasionally made it into watching rotation， so I was able to follow him as he became a part of successful television projects。However， Haynes’ memoir shows how actors trying to tell the truth on screen have their own backstories。 Though writing about a wide swath of his life， Haynes ties together the narrative with key moments that define the person he has become。 This is not a light read。 There’s a lot of trauma detailed by Haynes。 But there’s also healing here。 It’s clear that in the process of getting sober Haynes has had time to reflect on his past and note the impact。 For example， Haynes’ relationship with his mother is complicated。 The reflective aspects where Haynes sees the connection between his actions and his mothers’ is particularly poignant。 And though their relationship is contentious， particularly after he comes out， it’s clear that there is also love between them。 As a reader， what strikes me the most is the way Haynes’ writing elicits empathy as the reader grieves with Haynes for his early loss of innocence and his desire to find an escape and numb the pain and anger。As a writing teacher， who has taught and written the memoir genre， I’d be remiss if I didn’t divorce the content from the craft and talk about the actual writing。 There is genuine artistry and skill in the construction of Haynes’ narrative。 He uses the mosaic form to assemble what might seem like disparate parts of his life into larger themes。 Through the structure of the narrative， Haynes finds a pace that condenses large sections of time， allowing for the expansion of key moments that continually tie back to central concepts。 Additionally， the cyclical nature of many of the sections and scenes allows each part to feel complete within the larger context of the memoir。For example， this works well in a chapter where Haynes details his time on Teen Wolf， which sticks out to me for obvious reasons; he begins the chapter driving a car， with Holland Roden and Crystal Reed as passengers， nearly hitting a deer。 At the end of the chapter， after Haynes has walked the red carpet at the Teen Wolf premiere， he sees a scene in the pilot episode when Tyler Posey’s character， Scott McCall， runs from a stampeding deer and Scott is nearly struck by a car。 Haynes compares the deer he nearly hit and the one on the screen to his look on the red carpet， noting how his eyes were scared and fearful as he looked beyond the immediate object hurtling at him and tried to swerve to keep from crashing。 This symbolism encapsulates Haynes’ larger struggles that were concealed by his success and rise to fame。In addition to the overall structure， vignettes within chapters capture moments that incorporate the five senses and offer the reader rich， vivid imagery。 Haynes also uses words well when he considers figurative language。 For example， when talking about a fountain where change was used to make wishes， he notes how he could see the cemetery of coins beneath the water， which is an incredible turn of phrase and a great image。 By the way， structurally the fountain also provides a cyclical and affective loop since it appears in the first and penultimate chapters。In terms of the writing， it is clear that Haynes carefully constructed his narrative。 He had a clear path in mind and those who read early drafts provided careful feedback that helped him shape his story into the published work。 Haynes’ memoir also shows how artists can often find various outlets for their talent。 If Haynes decided to continue with a writing career， I honestly think he would be very successful。Overall， someone interested in details behind Haynes’ time on Teen Wolf and Arrow will ultimately be disappointed by the content。 But there’s a great deal more to recommend Haynes’ memoir than just the work that has elevated him to the level of celebrity。 As a fan， I’m excited to see where Haynes goes next because it is clear that he is talented in a range of venues， including constructing a cohesive， compelling， and truthful narrative in a variety of mediums。 。。。more
Margaret
，
this book is so gut-wrenchingly real and honest， it just breaks my heart。 To think of all Colton has been through， and that he has found his way past it to his honest self， is such a joy。 I felt so sad/happy/elated/crushed throughout the reading of this story。 I was rooting for him， mad at him， protective of him， and a multitude of other feelings。 This is written in such a way that it evokes all the emotions to the max。 Thank you， Colton， for sharing such truthful and personal stories with us。 I this book is so gut-wrenchingly real and honest， it just breaks my heart。 To think of all Colton has been through， and that he has found his way past it to his honest self， is such a joy。 I felt so sad/happy/elated/crushed throughout the reading of this story。 I was rooting for him， mad at him， protective of him， and a multitude of other feelings。 This is written in such a way that it evokes all the emotions to the max。 Thank you， Colton， for sharing such truthful and personal stories with us。 I'm sure it will be a beacon to other aching souls。 。。。more
Tanya
，
There were so many parts of this book that I would catch myself feeling disturbed by。 But this is his life and he was an innocent victim in so many of the things that happened to him in his most vulnerable years growing up， and oftentimes by those who were supposed to protect him。 It takes a brave person to bare the most private moments of their life， for others to judge。 Go into this book acknowledging that， and just step back and realize he is telling the story of his life and I think you will There were so many parts of this book that I would catch myself feeling disturbed by。 But this is his life and he was an innocent victim in so many of the things that happened to him in his most vulnerable years growing up， and oftentimes by those who were supposed to protect him。 It takes a brave person to bare the most private moments of their life， for others to judge。 Go into this book acknowledging that， and just step back and realize he is telling the story of his life and I think you will love and respect Colton Haynes for overcoming more obstacles than one person should have to face。 。。。more
Beth-Ann Cosenza Bourgeois
，
Its。 Great book。。 sad about all the adults in your life that took advantage of you。 I'm glad you found yourself and hope。 Congratulations on making it through all the hard times。 Its。 Great book。。 sad about all the adults in your life that took advantage of you。 I'm glad you found yourself and hope。 Congratulations on making it through all the hard times。 。。。more
Jimmy
，
Thank you to NetGalley for this ARC。 While I'm familiar with a lot of Colton's acting work， I was blown away by his story。 This book is so well written for a celebrity memoir。 His voice is so clear and honest and handles extremely difficulty events with sincerity and nuance。 Thank you to NetGalley for this ARC。 While I'm familiar with a lot of Colton's acting work， I was blown away by his story。 This book is so well written for a celebrity memoir。 His voice is so clear and honest and handles extremely difficulty events with sincerity and nuance。 。。。more
Bakertyl
，
An impressively beautiful story about a boy trying to heal from sexual abuse and broken dreams。I've never seen the shows Colton has acted in， but I've seen his childhood in the lives of hundred of students I've worked with over my career。 Kids lost， looking for meaning they struggle to find but adults struggle to find meaning too so why are we surprised kids don't find it？ Kids wanting a purpose that doesn't match their dreams， leading to years of disappointment as they fight to be happy in a tr An impressively beautiful story about a boy trying to heal from sexual abuse and broken dreams。I've never seen the shows Colton has acted in， but I've seen his childhood in the lives of hundred of students I've worked with over my career。 Kids lost， looking for meaning they struggle to find but adults struggle to find meaning too so why are we surprised kids don't find it？ Kids wanting a purpose that doesn't match their dreams， leading to years of disappointment as they fight to be happy in a trap they set for their future selves。Colton tells a good story， spending time with his dysfunctional childhood and his dysfunctional adulthood， finding parallels that he never healed from。 He finds abuse in adults that should have protected him and hope in a druggie in rehab， hopefully showing there is hope for the rest of us as well。**I received an advance copy from NetGalley and Atria Books （for a hard copy） in exchange for an honest review。 。。。more
bailey
，
I didn’t know anything about Colton going into this but his voice and authenticity with his story nailed home the struggles of so many queer， low income youth growing up these days。 I saw myself in many of Colton stories and his openness is charming。
Michael
，
I just finished an ARC of this memoir and am left in awe that Colton Hayes was able to share such an honest look at his still young life。 I have worked with teens in crisis for years and this will be a book that I will be sharing with some of the ones who have made it to adulthood but are still struggling， that a better future is possible。
John Amory
，
Searing。 Difficult。 Messy。 Vulnerable。
Tosh Farrell
，
As a huge fan of MTV’s Teen Wolf， Colton Haynes has taken up real estate in my brain for years now。 With this book he has upended everything I could have thought I knew about him。 This was a raw and vulnerable celebrity memoir that really digs into the real life experience。 Those looking for the glamorous gossip should look for another book。 From the very first chapter you realize this will not be an easy story to read， but it is an important one。 This book touches on sexual assault， physical ab As a huge fan of MTV’s Teen Wolf， Colton Haynes has taken up real estate in my brain for years now。 With this book he has upended everything I could have thought I knew about him。 This was a raw and vulnerable celebrity memoir that really digs into the real life experience。 Those looking for the glamorous gossip should look for another book。 From the very first chapter you realize this will not be an easy story to read， but it is an important one。 This book touches on sexual assault， physical abuse and substance abuse。 It was so brave of him to tell this story， and I hope telling it has helped him heal。 The first couple chapters feel clipped， blending lots of short bursts of story together， but as the book goes on you fall into his voice more。 It focuses a lot on his childhood and coming of age， and is less focused on the period of time when he was in the zeitgeist。 While I do wish the book was a bit more balanced in this aspect， I understand how his childhood has a greater effect in the whole narrative。 My ARC was provided by the publisher via Netgalley in exchange for an honest review。 。。。more
Chelsea
，
Thank you Netgalley for the advance reader copy of Miss Memory Lane by Colton Haynes in exchange for an honest review。 I've been a fan of Colton Haynes since I saw him in The Gates， then Arrow and Teen Wolf。 I think it's interesting how much we judge people based on an image and never look deeper。 This book gives that deeper look into his life and what he went through growing up。 Beautifully written and totally relatable。 Thank you Netgalley for the advance reader copy of Miss Memory Lane by Colton Haynes in exchange for an honest review。 I've been a fan of Colton Haynes since I saw him in The Gates， then Arrow and Teen Wolf。 I think it's interesting how much we judge people based on an image and never look deeper。 This book gives that deeper look into his life and what he went through growing up。 Beautifully written and totally relatable。 。。。more
Nev
，
Colton Haynes’ memoir is a very heavy read。 It deals with a lot of addiction， complicated familial relationships， homophobia， abuse， and being sexualized at a young age。 Colton’s writing was really engaging and brought all the emotions and situations to life。 His life growing up and then starting to model as a teenager were a large focus within the book。 I think if someone was going into this mainly wanting behind the scenes stories about Teen Wolf or Arrow then they might be disappointed by how Colton Haynes’ memoir is a very heavy read。 It deals with a lot of addiction， complicated familial relationships， homophobia， abuse， and being sexualized at a young age。 Colton’s writing was really engaging and brought all the emotions and situations to life。 His life growing up and then starting to model as a teenager were a large focus within the book。 I think if someone was going into this mainly wanting behind the scenes stories about Teen Wolf or Arrow then they might be disappointed by how not a lot of page time is dedicated to that。 While those shows do get mentions， it’s not the typical actor memoir style where there’s a lot of fun stories about shooting different episodes and whatnot。 With Colton’s memoir it’s more about how he was feeling being in the closet and spiraling out of control in the background while those shows were going on。 I appreciated getting a different look into an actor’s life and seeing how crushing it was for him when people on his team were convincing him that he couldn’t be open about being gay。 I did feel like at times when the book would skip forward by a few years that I was missing out on a lot of context when things would just be mentioned in passing。 It just made some parts of the book feel lopsided when certain things would be written about in depth and then something else that seemed like a big event was only given a couple of sentences。 But overall I think this was a really interesting memoir and definitely worth checking out。 Thank you to the publisher for providing an advance copy via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review。 。。。more
Deena B
，
Some books you just breeze right through and this was one of them。
Rhonda Duncan
，
We tend to view those in the "spotlight" as superhuman， perfect examples of success with grande lifestyles and endless fame and fortune。 Take a dive into the cold hard reality of what lies behind those movie lights and all that success。 My heart goes out to Colton Haynes。 May your journey be more blessed than your past。 This brought me tears as I have a friend with the same dreams as you but I've never asked "are you okay"。 We tend to view those in the "spotlight" as superhuman， perfect examples of success with grande lifestyles and endless fame and fortune。 Take a dive into the cold hard reality of what lies behind those movie lights and all that success。 My heart goes out to Colton Haynes。 May your journey be more blessed than your past。 This brought me tears as I have a friend with the same dreams as you but I've never asked "are you okay"。 。。。more
Ashley Morris
，
This was a quick read。 I finished it in about two days。 I wish colton spent more time on important parts of his life such as rehab and his marriage。 A lot of his past is seeded in trauma and may be difficult for some readers。 He barely talks about Teen Wolf but spends the first quarter talking about his years spent modeling。 I’m hopeful Colton found the writing process to be therapeutic。
Steph
，
I knew Colton Haynes from Arrow， but honestly knew very little about him before reading this book。 I'm honestly speechless after reading this。 This book is raw and doesn't sugar coat the things he has been through。 I'm impressed that someone still so young can look back at the things he addresses in the book and talk about them。 I hope this book reaches people who need to hear his story。 He really could be an inspiration for people to know that they are worth it。 The book is written quite well， I knew Colton Haynes from Arrow， but honestly knew very little about him before reading this book。 I'm honestly speechless after reading this。 This book is raw and doesn't sugar coat the things he has been through。 I'm impressed that someone still so young can look back at the things he addresses in the book and talk about them。 I hope this book reaches people who need to hear his story。 He really could be an inspiration for people to know that they are worth it。 The book is written quite well， it reads like a show or a movie with just enough description and insight to set the stage without taking away from the story。I was given a copy from Netgalley and Atria Books in exchange for an honest review。 。。。more
Ryan Field
，
I've been following Colton Haynes on social media for a while but I never knew his life。。。his circumstances。。。was this intense。 I found it hard to put this book down， but when I did I gained a whole new sense of respect for Haynes。 Bravo， bravo， bravo！ I've been following Colton Haynes on social media for a while but I never knew his life。。。his circumstances。。。was this intense。 I found it hard to put this book down， but when I did I gained a whole new sense of respect for Haynes。 Bravo， bravo， bravo！ 。。。more
Cody James
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Colton Haynes is the definition of “don’t judge a book by its cover”。 I’ll be honest， I don’t watch a lot of tv so I’ve never seen either of Colton’s popular tv shows， but you can’t be a gay guy and not know who he is。 The mans gorgeous…。but that’s part of the problem Colton works through in this breathtaking and raw autobiography。 From an early age （holy shit wasn’t expecting THAT） Colton learned that his good looks and body will help him get ahead in life。 We read through very raw descriptions Colton Haynes is the definition of “don’t judge a book by its cover”。 I’ll be honest， I don’t watch a lot of tv so I’ve never seen either of Colton’s popular tv shows， but you can’t be a gay guy and not know who he is。 The mans gorgeous…。but that’s part of the problem Colton works through in this breathtaking and raw autobiography。 From an early age （holy shit wasn’t expecting THAT） Colton learned that his good looks and body will help him get ahead in life。 We read through very raw descriptions of his assault and his sexual relationship with an older man when he was very young， so proceed with caution if these are triggering topics for you。 Also， we see him dealing immensely with body image issues and addiction。 Colton didn’t hold back in this。 So often， celebrity biographies are very impressionable…。 They peal back layers just enough to be honest but hid the real grit of their story。 Colton rips the layers away and you get to understand the man behind the beautiful face so much better。 A profound， at times hard to read， story of a young man working through his demons。 。。。more
Kera’s Always Reading
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This one will stay with me。This was a dark and intimate memoir and I found that I couldn’t stop sinking further and further into it。 Haynes is such a storyteller。 He pulls you along in these moments of his life that he is sharing and brings it all to into vivid clarity。With an upbringing uniquely similar to my own， I could easily recognize traits and coping mechanisms Haynes used to make it through the day。 I felt such a connection with his story。This was brutal and raw and so incredibly good。 H This one will stay with me。This was a dark and intimate memoir and I found that I couldn’t stop sinking further and further into it。 Haynes is such a storyteller。 He pulls you along in these moments of his life that he is sharing and brings it all to into vivid clarity。With an upbringing uniquely similar to my own， I could easily recognize traits and coping mechanisms Haynes used to make it through the day。 I felt such a connection with his story。This was brutal and raw and so incredibly good。 He is a beautiful soul and I am so honored to have read an early copy。 。。。more
Chad Guarino
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Colton Haynes pulls no punches going up against his greatest opponent - himself - in Miss Memory Lane， his debut memoir。 On the surface a successful model and actor （Teen Wolf and Arrow）， Haynes sheds all of the protective top layers to shine a brutally honest light on his struggles with body image， addiction， sexuality， and coming to terms with a confusing familial upbringing。 Written with a bold and stark lyricism， many of Haynes' stories are graphic and shocking which can make for a difficult Colton Haynes pulls no punches going up against his greatest opponent - himself - in Miss Memory Lane， his debut memoir。 On the surface a successful model and actor （Teen Wolf and Arrow）， Haynes sheds all of the protective top layers to shine a brutally honest light on his struggles with body image， addiction， sexuality， and coming to terms with a confusing familial upbringing。 Written with a bold and stark lyricism， many of Haynes' stories are graphic and shocking which can make for a difficult read at times， but nobody ever said that confronting personal demons would ever make for light reading。 As someone who often struggles with depression， anxiety， and intrusive thoughts， I was able to empathize with the struggles depicted here and found myself actively rooting for Haynes throughout the book。 The self-awareness on display here was not born overnight but through some grueling inner battles and I appreciate the strength it must have taken to get to the point of writing about them for a wider audience。 **I was given a copy of this book by the publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review。 My thanks to Atria Books and Netgalley** 。。。more
Wanda Argersinger
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Colton Haynes wanted to be loved and accepted。 He found love m the public when he was a model then an actor， but the adoration of fans wasn't the kind of love that fills an empty heart。 Add to this the unacceptance of his gay personality by his family and Colton spiraled into a life of abusive sex， alcohol， drugs， and a life almost lostWith raw， unflinching gritty detail， Colton writes about his life and what it's like living a life of unacceptance。 This is not a typical coming of age story， but Colton Haynes wanted to be loved and accepted。 He found love m the public when he was a model then an actor， but the adoration of fans wasn't the kind of love that fills an empty heart。 Add to this the unacceptance of his gay personality by his family and Colton spiraled into a life of abusive sex， alcohol， drugs， and a life almost lostWith raw， unflinching gritty detail， Colton writes about his life and what it's like living a life of unacceptance。 This is not a typical coming of age story， but one of coming of age while trying to accept a person's own identity when those closest to him refused to acknowledge what he knew in his heart。 。。。more
Transgender Bookworm
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Disclosure : I received a free ARC of this book through Netgalley in exchange for my honest opinion。 It is often said in recovery circles that you are only as sick as your secrets。 That hiding from what is hurting you only begets more pain。 That shame and secrecy only feed your problems and the only way out is by shining a light on your hurt。 Colton Haynes's secrets were killing him both figuratively and literally。 Miss Memory Lane is a beautiful memoir that will sit heavy on my heart for some t Disclosure : I received a free ARC of this book through Netgalley in exchange for my honest opinion。 It is often said in recovery circles that you are only as sick as your secrets。 That hiding from what is hurting you only begets more pain。 That shame and secrecy only feed your problems and the only way out is by shining a light on your hurt。 Colton Haynes's secrets were killing him both figuratively and literally。 Miss Memory Lane is a beautiful memoir that will sit heavy on my heart for some time。 I am in awe of the vulnerability it must have taken for Colton to put pen to page and offer his pain to the world。 This is a book about letting go of secrets and learning to love yourself， but it is no standard fare celebrity tell-all。 This is not a book of Hollywood gossip or petty grievances。 Colton didn't need to be a celebrity at all for his story to be worth telling。 This is a story of a young man who was constantly looking for love and validation in all the wrong places。 A young man who believed he was nothing more than a beautiful body and whose only currency in the world was his sexual utility。 My heart ached for Colton reading this book for all the ways he was failed and all the ways he let himself be his own worst enemy。 Thank you Colton for sharing this story that you owed no one。 Thank you for your truth。 。。。more
Matt
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HAPPY PUB DAY， just in time for Pride Month！First of all， I have to give props to Colton because this could not have been an easy memoir to write， but I believe it is a necessary one。 The first half （or so） of the book focuses on his childhood which reads like a family drama， and I had to keep reminding myself this was an actual person’s memoir because I couldn’t believe some of the things that occurred。Colton discovers sex at a young age and quickly develops an unhealthy relationship with sex。 HAPPY PUB DAY， just in time for Pride Month！First of all， I have to give props to Colton because this could not have been an easy memoir to write， but I believe it is a necessary one。 The first half （or so） of the book focuses on his childhood which reads like a family drama， and I had to keep reminding myself this was an actual person’s memoir because I couldn’t believe some of the things that occurred。Colton discovers sex at a young age and quickly develops an unhealthy relationship with sex。 This evolves into an adult Colton who gives us a very eye-opening account of just how much ‘sex sells’ in Hollywood。As someone who’s been a fan of Colton for years （and yes， was a celeb crush of mine， I’ll admit it）， I had no idea that he came out as gay as a teenager and was even engaged to a man upon starting his modeling career。 However when he began pursuing acting he was told to go back into the closet， and to tone down his voice and mannerisms to appear ‘straighter’。 Sex， alcohol， and drug addictions were secretly deteriorating him behind the scenes as he had to keep his authentic life hidden。Haynes gives us a very real portrait of what it’s like to be LGBTQ in Hollywood， and some of its realities will shock you。 。。。more
Laura
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This was clearly a very important book for Haynes to write， and I'm sure it will find its audience。 But there are so many trigger warnings， and I found it really emotionally difficult to read。ARC received from publisher。 This was clearly a very important book for Haynes to write， and I'm sure it will find its audience。 But there are so many trigger warnings， and I found it really emotionally difficult to read。ARC received from publisher。 。。。more
Martin Maenza
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